


Ashes and Wine

by srmiller



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, olicity - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-04
Updated: 2014-04-07
Packaged: 2018-01-18 04:03:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1414375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/srmiller/pseuds/srmiller
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My first song prompt ever came from Tumblr for Olicity, “Ashes and Wine” by A Fine Frenzy<br/>Six months ago Felicity put her feelings on the line, and Oliver walked away; but when Felicity finds out about a bug Oliver put on her new boyfriend's car (ostensibly to watch over her) they have a fight about the real reason Oliver is being over protective.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

He’d lost the only love worth fighting for, he knew that.

Oliver had been on his way to his office when he stopped at the entrance to the IT department in an absurd and juvenile attempt to catch sight of the blonde in her natural habitat.

Somewhere where she still smiled with freedom and there wasn’t that wary, angry and wounded animal look to her eyes.

She moved through the main collection of desks, she’d gotten rid of the stifling cubicles to make the space friendlier and encourage interaction amongst the techs, ideas grow faster when there’s more fertilizer she’d told Digg.

Digg being the operative name because it had been six months since he’d been the recipient of one of Felicity’s smiles, her stories.

Not that he could blame her.

He readied himself to walk away when that sixth sense she had when it came to him kicked in and she stopped walking and turned to look directly at him, an obvious question on her face.

Oliver shook his head, no. There wasn’t anything Arrow related to discuss.

Pushing his hands in to his pocket he walked away and back towards his office, trying to ignore the anvil which had settled on to his heart, the rust of which had slowly (and painfully) began to eat at his soul.

He walked in to his office, smiling at Thea sitting at her desk, the plaque on her desk reading Assistant Executive Officer.

She’d be damned if she’d be his assistant when it was her name on the building same as his.

Sitting down at his desk he started to push through the paperwork, unaware of the hour passing until the door to his office slammed open, hitting the wall.

Looking up, his adrenaline and instincts already kicking in, he saw not a threat but Felicity in all her brilliant anger, behind her was an amused and slightly worried Thea, “Sorry, Ollie-“

“Thea, will you give us a moment?” Felicity asked, her tone sharp, her eyes steady on the man behind the desk.

“Yeah, okay. Call me if I need to get the maintenance staff up here for blood stains,” she remarked wryly as she closed the door to the office, giving them privacy.

(After Isabelle had blown up the offices some years ago Oliver had installed actual walls instead of glass in his offices, the privacy allowing more Arrow related things to happen within the walls of QC.)

Oliver stood up, trying not to act guilty though for some reason the emotion seemed to coat his skin, “Felicity.”

“You put a tracking device on his car?”

Shit.

Seeing the look of admission on his face she swore under her breath.

“We went to lunch,” she explained, her voice barely controlled under a wave of anger. “And my phone was acting up, going slower then usual and I did quick little check and lo and behold there was interference.”

She paused, giving him the opportunity to fess up but he only pressed his lips together in silence, and when she spoke there was a new kind of anger in her voice, “From a bug. Planted under the bumper of Eddie’s car.”

They stood on either side of the office, gladiators forced to face off but not yet ready to draw first blood but when he still refused to say anything the anger reached her eyes.

“Say something,” she ordered, and they both knew her loud voice was an instant away from exploding on them both.

“I wanted to make sure you were safe,” he finally confessed, his voice soft in a useless gesture to soften the admission.

“Safe?!” she demanded, her voice rising. “From a harmless-“

“Harmless?!” he yelled back, taking a quick step forward. “Harmless like the guy who sold toys and masqueraded as bomber? Harmless like the guy who tried to save Starling City by becoming mayor before laying siege to it? Harmless like the Australian entrepreneur who funded Moira Queen’s campaign while trying to destroy everything?”

She crossed her arms in a defensive motion, “You know I did a background on him before we started dating.”

“I couldn’t trust that.”

“You trusted it enough in the past,” she accused.

“This is different and you know it,” he yelled back.

The space between them disappeared, the improbable red string tying them together had pulled them closer till they were only inches apart as it always had.

As it always would.

Her eyes narrowed as she glared up at him, and for a painful second he missed her glasses. He didn’t know why, hadn’t dared to ask, but slowly over the past few months the ponytail had disappeared, and the glasses had been tucked away in their case.

He remembered the rarity of it before, seeing her hair down and the view of her face unhindered by the black plastic had usually only happened on stressful days or when she was going undercover.

She hid behind those pieces of glamour.

Over the past few months, she’d slowly been hiding pieces of herself as she stepped further and further away.

“Why?”

He tilted his head, confused, “Why?”

“Why is this different?” she challenged, knowing he wouldn’t answer.

His silence held heavy between them, a weight on that fragile red string, but they knew why this was different, why he’d bugged the car of a seemingly hapless R&D expert.

He dropped his gaze and forced himself to meet her eyes, “I know I’ve got no claim on you.”

“And whose fault is that Oliver?”

There was a quick flash of memory of the night after they’d defeated Slade, truly and for the last time, when she’d come running to him in the Foundry, kissing him till he’d forgotten everything else.

Then he pulled back, pulled away, and walked out.

One last chance at keeping her safe, if not from their enemies, then from his tendency to hurt those he held too tight.

After all, hadn’t that been how he’d lost Sara years ago?

That’s when Felicity had quit her job as his EA and moved to take over the IT department, a change he hadn’t fought. And slowly, over the course of hours and weeks, she’d pulled away from him and while she still fought at his side, she no longer fought with him.

“Whose fault?” she pushed, unwilling to give up. She had her pain, her own heartbreak, and maybe it was cruel or childish but it felt good to lash out and make him admit the pain he’d put them both through.

“I don’t want to fight!” he snapped.

“You should have thought of that before you bugged my boyfriend’s car!”

Oliver walked away, his footsteps heavy on the rug Thea had picked out, his mind bruising with the thoughts going through his head.

He’d walked away from her because he wanted to spare her heart, something he was sure to break with his clumsy and violent hands. He’d walked away to spare himself the pain of having something good and beautiful and then losing it as he had everything pure in his life.

He’d walked away because he’d been a coward, because he could see no other way.

There’s another way.

He closed his eyes at the memory of the way it had been, when she’d smiled and challenged him and damn it, just made him better.

Turning suddenly, quick enough Felicity flinched at how quickly he was in front of her again. His heart was still heavy, but his eyes hadn’t been clearer in months.

“I change my mind.”

Felicity fumbled for words, none of the sounds coming out of her mouth making any sense until she closed her eyes and counted down from three, “Change your mind about what exactly?”

“Fighting.”

She rolled her eyes as she shook her head with dwindling patience, “I’m pretty sure we haven’t stopped.”

He shook his head but didn’t explain himself because Felicity knew, she knew him, she’d understand, “But I’m only going to fight if there is something left worth fighting for.”

And his partner, the woman who, even if he never held her, would always be his, widened her eyes but didn’t take a step back. She didn’t attempt to put any space between them, and more importantly she didn’t hit him.

There was caution in her eyes, and as well as she knew him, he knew her. He’d seen something, there wasn’t a word in any of the languages he knew to describe it but it lifted the anvil off his heart an inch and he thought he felt the smallest light find its way to those dark places.

He didn’t touch her, knew it wasn’t his right, but as he had so many times before he let his eyes brush against her skin and whispered in a voice hoarse from emotion he’d kept contained for years, “Is there a chance?”

On the desk his phone rang but he ignored it, waiting for the answer which, in a single syllable, could change everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [share on tumblr if you liked it!](http://awriterincowboyboots.tumblr.com/post/81678770972/ashes-and-wine)


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I had originally intended this as a one shot, but here and over on Tumblr I've asked to add on to the story so here is chapter two, chapter three will be uploaded sometime tomorrow!

_“Is there a chance?”_

Felicity closed her eyes in a futile attempt to control the barrage of emotions the simple question provoked, _was there a chance?_

The problem was there was always a chance, that’s what happened when you gave your heart to someone and never asked for it back. There was always a glimmer of hope, no matter how painful it was.

No matter how terrible of an idea.

Burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice, shame on me.

She should have walked away six months ago-four years ago-instead of agreeing to work with the Hood provisionally. But there was no walking away from the Arrow because his cause had become her own, she wore the mask as much as he did.

And so she’d tried to find a place in between, she’d gone to Sara’s grave to talk it out with her best friend and Felicity imagined her making a joke about Felicity being in purgatory and in the silence of the cemetery, by a recycled grave and an edited gravestone, Felicity had chuckled.

So she’d met Eddie, and they’d started dating. She’d pulled away personally from Oliver with the hope space would make the distance easier, but instead there was a chasm between them, a constant echo of what could have been.

But the anger at the bug Oliver had placed on Eddie’s car was enough to keep her from shouting _Yes_ as loud as she could, kept her from wrapping her arms around him and kissing him again like she had six months ago.

For a fearful minute after she’d discovered the bug, she thought someone was using Eddie to get to her. There were more than a handful of people who knew she worked with the Arrow, knew Oliver _was_ the Arrow and she was terrified one of those enemies had decided to use Eddie to get to her.

But once she found the bug and recognized her own work the fear and the tension left her with nothing but certainty this wasn’t going to work because she couldn’t tell him everything, couldn’t be honest about the hours she worked and her relationship with Oliver and Digg. The only person she could trust with those sorts of secret was someone she knew she was going to spend the rest of her life with, but she couldn’t imagine what would happen if down the line he did propose and Felicity told him everything.

Would he be angry with her for lying? Would he turn her and the rest of her team- _her family_ -in? Would he be angry at her for tricking him into loving her when he’d never even knew her?

And so she’d broken up with him in his car outside the QC building and had taken the pain and anger from the decision to Oliver’s feet and it felt good to yell, to fight, to throw words she’d been thinking for too long.

But Oliver never played by the rules.

He wanted to fight, he said, with hope shining through hopeless eyes, but only if there’s something left worth fighting for.

And _damn it_ , she wanted to fight too but he wasn’t the only one who had gone through a crucible, wasn’t the only one who had put up a wall to protect a heart that had already felt too much.

Oliver was no longer the only one who found it hard to trust.

When the phone rang from his desk, sharp and sudden enough to cause her to start, she opened her eyes and met his.

_Is there a chance?_

He was waiting for her answer, waiting to see hear what she would say but the answer was stuck in her throat.

Should she say no to him? Finally cut this worn out string holding them together once and for all?

Or perhaps, and more importantly she thought as she held his gaze and felt the heat from his gaze burn through her veins, emotions which refused to die, _Could_ she say no to him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [share on tumblr if you liked it!](http://awriterincowboyboots.tumblr.com/post/81791011487/ashes-and-wine-pt-2)


	3. Chapter 3

_Is there a chance?_

It had been four months since he’d asked, since he’d put his heart at her feet.

Four months since she’d closed her eyes, four months since he’d survived the longest thirty seconds of his life.

And when she finally looked at him, her answer wasn’t _yes._

But it wasn’t _no_ either.

“Ask me tomorrow.”

He remembered his heart had stopped as the questions blew through is mind, and knowing him as well as she did she answered them before he was able to speak a word.

“I can’t say yes,” she told him, looking as pained as he felt. “Not right now, not today. But we both know I can’t say no and mean it so ask me tomorrow, and if I can’t give you an answer, ask me in a week. Keeping asking me Oliver, and maybe someday we will be in a place where I can give you the answer we both want.”

So they moved forward with slow, painful steps. Learning how to trust and depend on each other after half a year of agonizing distance was difficult, but they were determined to find their way back to being partners, to being friends, to being two people who loved each other even if they’d never admitted to being _in_ love.

Afterwards, Oliver started putting more effort in to intentionally spending time with Felicity and it became habit for them to sit in front of her computer at the end of the day in the foundry, watching whatever show she was binging at the moment.

And every few days Oliver would ask, _is there a chance?_

Sometimes it was when he brought coffee to her office (she hadn’t gone back to being his EA, and it had given Digg no small amount of pride it didn't seem to occur to Oliver to ask) and with a smile, he'd ask on his way out. She’d smiled back and told him to ask again.

A few times had been on the coms, and he’d hear her laugh and tell him now was not the time even as Roy made a quip about taking care of personal matters while on the clock.

After a month of going out to eat, and attending company parties _(not together of course, but the amount of time they spent with each other in the corner doesn’t escape anyone’s notice)_ those invisible barriers they had built slowly broke down and those instinctual, almost intimate touches returned.

And every few days Oliver would ask, _is there a chance?_

There were close calls they easily could have used as an excuse to fall together and instead they visited Tommy and Sara, Oliver's hand curling around Felicity's. Where they had once been partners, now they were friends.

And every few days Oliver would ask, _is there a chance?_

Then one day- four months, three days and six hours after the first time he'd asked- Felicity found him begrudgingly going through QC paperwork late one night. His jacket was gone, his tie pulled loose, the top two buttons of his shirt predictably undone.

"Yes."

He looked up at the sound of her voice, surprised to see her. "Yes?"

"Yes, Oliver Queen," she smiled. "There's a chance."

He didn't remember getting up and walking to her, but he did remember the happy sound of her laugh an instant before he tasted it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [share on tumblr if you liked it!](http://awriterincowboyboots.tumblr.com/post/82000014639/ashes-and-wine-pt-3)


End file.
